I found your owner... I am sorry to say that he has left you for a newer phone...

But don't be dismayed, I here analog pulse is making a comeback.

no GPS activated?

I have texted the Police concerning my predicament, but they have sadly rejected me, labeling my message as a 'Prank'. I am getting very lonely at this point; I'm tired of playing 30-second-long demos of Tetris and Pac-Man, bored with waiting for my pay-by-the-minute internet to load, and plain sick of listening to crappy, 8-bit ringtones! As I said, if anybody sees my Owner, pull him aside and inform him that you've found his phone - Then tell me that you've found my owner! I know someone must be reading this; if you are that someone, please help me. You may very well be my only hope.

-Lost My Owner

Hello, members of these fine Cell Phone Forums.
For quite some time, I have been missing my owner. I have looked everywhere for him; the Gallery, the Contacts, even the Bookmarks; but I simply cannot find him. I believe he is registered on some other forum, and is likely looking for me at this very moment in time. I have become very lonely, and have been considering removing my own battery. I know this is very immoral, but I just don't know what to do without my Owner. If anyone has seen him, please contact me as soon as possible. All help is appreciated.

-Lost My Owner